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Here is my current work in progress of page 3. Let me know if this… - Kissing Silver [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Hyptosis

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[Jan. 1st, 2011|11:54 am]
Hyptosis
Here is my current work in progress of page 3. Let me know if this reads better, the guys in the foreground on the bottom panel are the aliens.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: tsukikoushi
2011-01-01 09:46 pm (UTC)
I think that does read better! It feels like the explosion got significantly smaller in the redraw, though, and that seems to run a little counter to the 'impressive' value of the 'index cards'.

You might try pulling the camera back and up just a little more, giving the explosion more of the frame and making the aliens smaller at the bottom of it.
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[User Picture]From: hyptosis
2011-01-03 06:11 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the feedback, and good crits! I'll fix'r up in no time!
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[User Picture]From: spreston
2011-01-02 10:12 am (UTC)
Cool! I had to go see the first version you did cause I missed it.

A couple of suggestions though. First panel, why not have the rocket overlap into panel 2?

You could also add in a panel of what the guy is aiming at in between panels 1 and 2.

Panel 3, maybe add some motion blur here, so the panel doesn't look so still. Last panel is pretty cool, but remember to include the rocket launcher :)
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[User Picture]From: hyptosis
2011-01-03 06:12 pm (UTC)
Thanks man, good points. I'll work on it and post my updates soon. Stay cool DF.
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From: veshy
2011-01-03 01:47 am (UTC)
needs speedlines, baby! :D Or not, depending on the kinda style you're goin for, which I'm thinking not? ;D
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[User Picture]From: hyptosis
2011-01-03 06:12 pm (UTC)
Speedlines, I put those in my comics for lunch!

>_>

Thanks, we'll see how it looks =P
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From: (Anonymous)
2011-04-02 10:00 pm (UTC)

1991 acura integra pictures 105

762901
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